Happy New Year!
C.A. MacConnell
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12/31/2023
Pipe Dream
Something I just busted out on social media. I rather liked it...so I'm reposting it here.
Pipe Dream
You see, suddenly, four guys appeared, quietly setting up. They seemed to be around 17, and they all wore tattered clothes -- not store bought, no, but rather, the kind that were worn from life. When they were ready, the singer simply said, "We're Pipe Dream," and they started playing. I listened. My eyes widened. It was the best drummer I had ever heard in my entire life -- a tiny kid, hiding out in the back, playing his heart out like a monster. Then they finished and left, disappearing into the night, and I never saw any of them again. Right after that, my band won a contest and some recording time.
Moral of the story: some visions may seem like a "pipe dream," and life may present setbacks, but if I keep focusing on the good and doing the work, the "pipe dream" suddenly materializes and becomes reality.
Because somewhere, right now, some kid quietly wakes up and realizes a little secret -- maybe he never made it through high school, but without a doubt, he's the best drummer in the world.
<3,
C.A. MacConnell
12/30/2023
Kylin, Horse.
Good morning. Photo on film. I loved this apartment, and this cat, for sure. There were two apartments I've loved...one was in VA, one here, but both were short-lived. Both were in walking distance of an artsy movie theater and natural food store. :) I've never had a house, but it's always been a secret dream of mine. I'd love a new place, a brighter one, even a studio, but honestly, I'm extremely lucky to be where I am for various reasons. I remember that every single day, because I've lived in some pretty horrible places, let me tell you. I love older buildings with oval windows and such. I've never had much furniture, so I don't care about that. Usually, what I care about are such things as the light and the feel.
I adore places that have a history about them...places that feel like they have stories to tell. :)
I'll be giving a talk tonight, and I'm looking forward to it, as I haven't done that in a while. I enjoy public speaking...my goal is to tell the truth and add some lightness and humor, but I usually leave the words up to the universe, although I always focus on maintaining the utmost integrity, both in writing and speech. It is my story, and I would never even hint at another's identity, situation, and the like. Not my business. Never have, never will.
Reminding myself to slow it down, trust myself, and keep the focus on the moment. There are situations I don't understand, and perhaps it'll always be confusing, but this morning, I've settled into some peace with that.
Be easy on yourself. And I will too.
Hope you have a beautiful day, wherever you are, whatever you're getting into!
Love to you!
C.A. MacConnell
12/29/2023
Glove 16. The Courage Rests Inside.
Going forward with my writing, I'm keeping this in mind because like Richard, I don't have to prove anything. Instead, I know that the story, my experience, speaks for itself. I've never had writer's block. I always have stories and poems going on, and I'm always creating drafts, even if I'm not putting them out to the public, but I do take breaks in order to allow certain works to "marinate." And that is why I've let Book Five sit for a time, because I've needed patience, distance, refection, time, and a new perspective in order to see the pattern, to bring out the individual style and path. I've needed this time to regroup and understand how to revise it.
And soon, I'll return to the process, allowing the new perspective to shine. And this break, these reflections, and these thoughts have brought me to a better place, one of direct strength and wisdom, one of freedom and humble delivery.
When I sit down to make changes, it won't take much time to revise it, as I have a clear plan in mind. There is a lot to take out, and there is a lot to add, because I'm now seeing what's most important. And so, Book Five is still in the works. And if you are here reading my thoughts and words, I thank you for your support.
Hope you have a beautiful day. Perhaps I'll see you out and about. Love to you,
C.A. MacConnell
12/28/2023
The Foot
The Foot
Good morning. Positive thought for today, for me, for you... Not long ago, from overwork and stress and such, among other problems, I had some inflammation on the bone on the front of my foot. I worked anyway, and I was hurting, and I was frightened about the upcoming doctor's appointment. Anyway, I was heading to get a grocery cart, when a man stumbled up next to me...I looked over, and the man smiled, but I could see that he was having trouble walking as well. So, I pulled out a cart for him. Immediately, he smiled wide, grabbed my hand, and kissed it. In that moment, I felt a rush of love, and right then and there, in the store, I stared into his eyes, looked deeply at this stranger, and cried...I'll get back to this, hang on...
Later, the doctor told me that he was glad I came, because my problem could cause a fracture, but I ended up getting insoles that are the opposite of most insoles...and I'll be needing new shoes...turns out, in a world of insoles, as usual, my body is unique and stubborn as all hell.
Anyway, this morning, I"m thinking of the stranger in the store, the man who could barely walk, and I know that insoles will not solve his problem. Believe me, I'm not a fan of thinking that I should be grateful due to others' misery, no, not at all. I believe that all of our experiences are important, and all of our trials deserve love and care. So, no, I'm not making a statement about "well, it could be worse." Actually, my take on this experience and this man's touch is this: remember, no matter what, we're not alone.
Love to you,
C.A. MacConnell C. 2023
12/27/2023
Two Miles In.
Love to you, C.A. MacConnell
12/25/2023
Spade, Swirls.
Good morning! Just some things I took yesterday. Have a good day. Love to you,
C.A. MacConnell
12/24/2023
12/22/2023
Happy Holidays!
Strangely enough, my grampie had a photographic memory his whole life, before the onset of his illness. He was a minister, and when he wrote sermons, after glancing at it once, he had it memorized! No lie. Grampie was quite gentle; he loved to garden, fish, and the like. At the dinner table, sometimes he told jokes that were incredibly long stories, ha; they were so long that I used to get lost in the story, and by the time he got to the punchline, I didn't get it at all, haha, but I laughed anyhow.
Emily was gentle at times, but she definitely had a fierce wild streak that I loved. Emily was a walker! Like me, she hated to sit still...we'd often run into each other on the streets, and we'd both be pounding away at the pavement, smiling. Literally, she kept on walking right up until the last month of her life. Unbelievable.
Thinking of both of them at the moment. People...so unique. I know Emily would have loved this photo. Love to you,
12/21/2023
Fence
Fence
Human, for years, I've been waiting.
Soon, I may warp into kindling --
no more than knots. Leaning back,
living in slant, there rests a ladder.
Today, may you reach out, touching
my strong side (the least faded,
the straightest, my shaded best).
Go ahead. Press your rising chest
against me. My mouth can take
the weight. You will make me --
one, lowly, man-made fence --
stand tall enough to come alive.
Peek above the jagged rows. Find
the crooked downside, for beyond
and below, a thousand splintered
stories, the aches of yesterdays,
are hidden within each crack and line.
So many whispers. All over, I hold
secrets. They are woven in.
They are carved into me
by little hands.
C.A. MacConnell
12/20/2023
Fear of Goodness
Just some thoughts upon waking...
Fear of Goodness
This morning, I was thinking about my fear, and the source of it. For a while now, I thought the fear was about loss, loneliness, trying to support myself, and struggling to figure out ways to strike out on my own...
But I'm learning that it's really not about those things at all. You see, my main fear is this: what if it is something good?
Ironically, what I am most afraid of is goodness. Because, in the past, several times, when I had a moment of great achievement, I had a powerful traumatic event occur at the same time and so, I associate the two. So now, when positive things roll in, as they have been lately, I become terrified, trained to believe it's a trick; it's as if I'm waiting for the "shoe to drop." I'll think things like this: surely, I'm about to lose everything.
Strangely, it terrifies me to accept these things: new opportunities, love without strings, healing, and positive growth. Lately, as I move forward, I continue to feel and experience such changes, and yet a part of the "old me" is still fearful and untrusting...sometimes, it rolls inside of me with a force, but I am able to "catch" it now.
Time to let that fear go, because I want a new me, one that believes that all is good, all is well, and that I deserve good things. Some of us grew up thinking that we were defective, that bad things should naturally come to us, that we deserved punishment, and the like.
But I'm realizing that that was false information, and I'm beginning to allow that thought to settle into my tricky brain, because those fears are no longer a part of the person I am becoming.
Here's to revelations. Here's to allowing success and love into my life. Today will be good, and today will be full of love, because I deserve nothing less.
Welcome to my new space of love. Perhaps you will join me in this new home.
C.A. MacConnell
12/19/2023
Winter Hawk.
Starting some new work today, and I'm grateful, and somewhat nervous, but I suppose that's normal. Wish me luck. Moving forward slowly, hoping my body heals.
Hope all is well in your world! Sending out love and light, always. Don't understand everything at the moment, but my heart feels full...
Love to you,
C.A. MacConnell
12/18/2023
Night Walk Photos
Night Walk
Shout out to Greg Flannery, former editor-in-chief of Article 21 and CityBeat News. One of the best editors I've ever worked with. Also, shout out to Larry Gross, RIP, former editor of CityBeat Living Out Loud. Two of the best troublemakers I've had the pleasure of knowing.
C.A. MacConnell
12/17/2023
Stairs.
Fun! I just took a night walk...here's one I liked. Never shot at night before. I'll share some more tomorrow. :) <3
C.A. MacConnell
Hot Dawg
C.A. MacConnell
Hollins Graveyard.
12/16/2023
Photo: Fly
Good morning. Something I just wrote on social media that I liked, so I'm reposting it here...
Positive thought for today, for me, for you: "flow" is the word that comes to mind; I embrace all of my feelings. I don't need to "get rid of them immediately," feel shame, or punish myself or others. Rather, I can let the feelings settle and allow them to flow through me. There is a time to act. There is a time to wait. Every feeling is important and so, I can feel it until it changes, and it will change soon.
But if I get stuck on something, I can ask for guidance.
C.A. MacConnell
-- inspired by Melody Beattie's writing. She has been very helpful to me. Hope you have a wonderful day. Love to you, C.A.
12/15/2023
12/14/2023
12/13/2023
12/12/2023
River at Night.
Here's one of my mess-ups that I just found. Decided I liked it, ha.
Love to you,
C.A. MacConnell
12/11/2023
Audience.
Today, the branches are still there, and they are still beautifully placed in that loving way. Right now, as I type, I'm glancing over at the image.
And I am here, and I feel alive.
And although I'm still wading through some deep grief, I feel a newfound strength. I'm thinking about all of the people I’ve known who never had the chance to use their voices – people that have passed due to emotional pain, neglect, abuse, and the like, countless people who (for whatever reason) never had the chance I have right now, the chance to tell the truth, the chance to break the silence. And I'm thinking about how I can be a voice for all of them.
I am far from alone.
You see, this morning, on the way to the foot doctor, a hawk flew right in front of my car, and I had the awakening that all of them, all of these angels in heaven, or whatever you want to call people who have passed on, all of them are behind me. Suddenly, I felt the presence of a great support, a vast, spiritual hug, if you will.
As difficult as these past two years have been, with all of the grief involved, now I know this: there is no question in my mind what I am here to do. Because this is war, and I'm here to write and fight for all of us.
And so, I have been for 26 years. And so, I will continue to do so.
Stay tuned,
C.A. MacConnell
12/09/2023
X
Love to you,
C.A. MacConnell
12/08/2023
Photo: Rugby
I trained another horse, Johnny, who did similar things...he'd threaten to bite people and such. But neither horse ever did it to me. It was like an inside joke...if they didn't like someone, both of them were like this: "Well, I could kill you if I wanted to, because you're annoying, but I'd rather have some fun today."
Ha, hope you have a good day. 💪💖😎😘
C.A. MacConnell
12/05/2023
See the Light
Good morning. Love to you. Resting today. No pop/caffeine, Day One. Wish me luck. :)
C.A. MacConnell
12/04/2023
Photo.
C.A. MacConnell
12/02/2023
12/01/2023
11/30/2023
11/27/2023
Howdy. Newsy Note to You.
Don't miss out, because...
Like me, my novels are full of fire! 💥💥💫💫❤🎸🏄✨✨✨🔥🔥🔥🔥
Find a description of each one, and all the goods, by clicking the book covers on the right side of this page. Hells yeah, presto.
My style = intense, unique, raw, gripping, and at times, definitely hilarious. When I grab onto a voice, I dig deeply, and as I write, I literally become the characters each moment. Strikingly real, poetic dialogue is my specialty.
I feel it all, and I feel it deeply, and this shows in my work.
Also, if you're looking for a laugh, and you're not afraid of bad words and edgier material, check out my comedy site. I usually laugh to tears when I write most of this stuff. It's all just fun practice for me, grabbing on to various voices...and I love to make people laugh. It's creative as all hell too, and it gives a sense of my fictional style.
And if you enjoy my work, either on this site or on the comedy site, please leave a donation! Every bit helps. Thanks so much!
Pass it on! Love,
C.A. MacConnell
11/26/2023
Wait 'til You See.
I took this a while ago, but here's something I just wrote on social media, and I felt moved to share it: "Good morning. Yesterday, I admit I had a tough day, but several times, I looked up and noticed how gorgeous the sky was...almost like God made it extra special yesterday. And when I turn around a tough day, I consider it a big win."
Perhaps that'll help someone. This morning, I am moved by the great steps we can take to move forward, if we work hard and persevere through the worst of the pain. True faith.
Love to you,
C.A. MacConnell
P.S. It's like God is saying, I really want these lessons with your day to stick. ;)
11/25/2023
Looking for Xmas Gifts?
I have four books out, and they're all gripping...as the popular saying goes, you won't be able to put them down...but in this case, it's definitely true. My mind rolls out quickly, and so do my books!
With each novel, I was the sole creator, writer, editor, and designer (interior and exterior).
Entirely an independent effort, I am proud of each and every detail.
Just click on the book covers on the right side of this page for a description. Or, see my Amazon Author Page right here.
And if you're curious about my training and background, check out my Author Bio. All the goods are there. :)
Each book is fast paced with a mystery element, and the characters are those you will never forget, I guarantee it. They are all quite unique, but my style is one that will grab you. Just check out the readers' comments!
Hope you will join me on my artistic journey.
11/23/2023
11/22/2023
Kylin, Morning.
Love to you,
C.A. MacConnell
11/21/2023
Barber Shoppe
C.A. MacConnell
11/20/2023
Cliff
Daily, I cut it up with certain folks, and they'll have me rolling...oftentimes, these little conversations work their way into my books. We crack up, but there is a lot of love rolling around between the sarcastic jabs as well. <3
Woke up with a dream...me working on books, me traveling some, a black dog, a small house, a partner. :) This is my dream. Ha, I'm off to do deliveries, but I'm certain my mind will be in the clouds.
Love to you,
11/19/2023
11/18/2023
Always a Window
Anyway, after that, feeling inspired, I walked through the back streets of town, trying anything and everything to distract myself. See, I was shocked and hurt about a breakup. In that moment, I was feeling somewhat worn-out and confused, surprised about the turn of events. But just then, I looked up at the sky and cried out to God for some direction. Immediately, I saw a man's image, and I heard a loud, clear message in my mind. This is what I heard: "You aren't going believe what happens next. It's going to be absolutely amazing." All at once, I felt peaceful. As I finished that lone walk, hope began to leak back in. The breakup was a mere bump in the road, but it catapulted me into some intense change.
Since that day, in ways both playful and difficult, my life has spiderwebbed its way into more growth than I ever could have imagined. Yes, it's still unfolding, and it has all taken hard, hard work and dedication. It has taken time. I've had to feel feelings that I thought...from time to time...would kill me. But they didn't kill me. See, I'm still here. Slowly, I began to uncover those things that held me back from being able to truly love and be loved.
Of course, I'm still working on it, and I believe the journey of learning how to love is a lifelong one. But today, I'm reflecting on the last ten years, and the "God patterns," as I call them. The learnings have been both tumultuous and beautiful, but I am a completely different person than I was that day, and I am proud of how far I've come along.
I can't wait to revise my fifth book, and I can't wait to get to work on the sixth, because there is an ultra-important story and message here, one that I believe will save lives. At the moment, in real time, it's all bleeding out in a way that's still fresh.
Overall, from me to you, I would definitely say it's been no less than amazing.
Love to you,
C.A. MacConnell
11/17/2023
Hello. Books!
Comedy Site
Official Facebook Page Follow me here!
Love, C.A. MacConnell