Around ten years ago, I watched a movie that intrigued me...and when the credits were rolling, I sprung up from the couch and began searching around on the internet, learning about the characters, the writers, the actors, and the like. Grinning intently, I delved into the back story, and I became quite lost in it, as I often do when I'm struck. (Of course, as a writer, characters often interest me, and if I am touched, I'll do some heavy digging. Obsessing comes in handy when writing, and if I channel it, I feel that it's a true gift).
Anyway, after that, feeling inspired, I walked through the back streets of town, trying anything and everything to distract myself. See, I was shocked and hurt about a breakup. In that moment, I was feeling somewhat worn-out and confused, surprised about the turn of events. But just then, I looked up at the sky and cried out to God for some direction. Immediately, I saw a man's image, and I heard a loud, clear message in my mind. This is what I heard: "You aren't going believe what happens next. It's going to be absolutely amazing." All at once, I felt peaceful. As I finished that lone walk, hope began to leak back in. The breakup was a mere bump in the road, but it catapulted me into some intense change.
Anyway, after that, feeling inspired, I walked through the back streets of town, trying anything and everything to distract myself. See, I was shocked and hurt about a breakup. In that moment, I was feeling somewhat worn-out and confused, surprised about the turn of events. But just then, I looked up at the sky and cried out to God for some direction. Immediately, I saw a man's image, and I heard a loud, clear message in my mind. This is what I heard: "You aren't going believe what happens next. It's going to be absolutely amazing." All at once, I felt peaceful. As I finished that lone walk, hope began to leak back in. The breakup was a mere bump in the road, but it catapulted me into some intense change.
Since that day, in ways both playful and difficult, my life has spiderwebbed its way into more growth than I ever could have imagined. Yes, it's still unfolding, and it has all taken hard, hard work and dedication. It has taken time. I've had to feel feelings that I thought...from time to time...would kill me. But they didn't kill me. See, I'm still here. Slowly, I began to uncover those things that held me back from being able to truly love and be loved.
Of course, I'm still working on it, and I believe the journey of learning how to love is a lifelong one. But today, I'm reflecting on the last ten years, and the "God patterns," as I call them. The learnings have been both tumultuous and beautiful, but I am a completely different person than I was that day, and I am proud of how far I've come along.
I can't wait to revise my fifth book, and I can't wait to get to work on the sixth, because there is an ultra-important story and message here, one that I believe will save lives. At the moment, in real time, it's all bleeding out in a way that's still fresh.
Overall, from me to you, I would definitely say it's been no less than amazing.
Love to you,
C.A. MacConnell
