So I was singing along to the radio, feeling serene, driving through this pretty nice part of town, when I stopped at a stoplight, and I looked to my left, and for some reason, a woman had pulled up on a pedestrian island, (I guess that’s what you call those) and she boldly parked her car there. She was just hanging out, like there was a magical meter there for her. I guess she couldn’t find a place to park.
I thought, how hilarious, but what an asshole. But, oh no, she wasn’t the biggest asshole of the day…
THEN a dude in an old Mercedes pulled up on the island right next to her, parking there specifically to yell at her. I heard him scream, “WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, PARKING ON A PEDESTRIAN ISLAND? DO YOU THINK YOU’RE ABOVE THE LAW!??? WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?” He screamed and screamed. I couldn’t understand what the woman was saying, but she was yelling and making mad, puppet-like gestures.
So there they were. Add it up. Suddenly, there were two parked illegally. And screaming and causing a scene. Cracking up, I seriously thought about pulling up to the Mercedes man and yelling, “WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, PARKING ON A PEDESTRIAN ISLAND TO YELL AT SOMEONE PARKED ON A PEDESTRIAN ISLAND? DO YOU THINK YOU’RE ABOVE THE LAW???????” I started rolling just thinking about it, but then I thought, the chain might become never-ending, and we could end up with the entire universe parked on that island, and that certainly would put a hold on the economy and maybe keep the police from doing their job and such. So I drove on.
C.A. MacConnell
