On my wall, I have a picture of Cindy, the miniature horse. She's an old girl, up in her years, but she is well-groomed (spotless, actually), in great care, and she's as precious and gentle as they come. Due to her age, she has her issues, but her owner is a loving, experienced fellow, and his care of her is "nonstop;" he's adamant about medical attention, turnout, and the like. These facts are clear to me, because I spent quite some time chatting with him one day, and I could tell that he was on a true, right mission. Cindy only "works" (has photos taken while he feeds her carrots) a few weekends out of the summer. During this time, she makes countless people smile -- adults and children -- and her look is one of quiet peace. It's in the eyes. The rest of the time, she lives in her field with the other minis. Not a bad life for old Cindy. Her coloring and soft hair remind me of a marshmallow.
Every time I glance at this picture, I think of these things: try to be well-groomed (ha), be gentle, be humble, love, enjoy life, take care of others, take care of every creature around. And it makes me think of the times when I haven't been like this, and it reminds me to strive to do it all better.
I'm human. I make decisions, both ridiculous and right-on. For me, these days, its not about my wild thoughts or intense feelings, it's about what I do with them later. I know that my growth, my recovery, comes from the action that I take next. A great warrior is gentle. A great medicine man is humble, and he lives and breathes inside the people, among them, not above them. These are grand goals, these selfless ways, but it's something to think about, something for which to reach; that's how I see it.
How can I offer a subtle gesture of kindness today? How can I make someone smile? Maybe my trip downtown to see a band was just so that I could give a homeless woman a cold drink. Maybe my desire to get books out there are so that I can have a signing and shake someone's hand, meet a new friend, change a life, who knows. How can I be a part of things today, rather than living in my individual, closed world? That's my version of spirituality, or God, as people say.
Cindy lives to make people smile. How can I follow her soft, gentle lead? Being gentle doesn't mean I'm weak. Gentleness allows for a quiet, inner strength to shine through. When I am gentle, I can hear the love of my life talking back.
Not a bad life for old Cindy.
I don't know about you, but I love you,
C.A. MacConnell
