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9/28/2018

One Buck, One Life

From the archives...

One Buck, One Life

Man, I was caught up. Running late, I was obsessed, trapped in busy thinking. I gripped the steering wheel. I need sleep, I miss mountains, thermal shirts, hit the men's section. That's right, I was a mad woman on a driving mission. Cat food, I'm a bad person, paper towels, Pepsi, coffee, what is he doing, what am I doing. On and on, my brain chattered. Cruising along, taking the turns too fast, I suddenly got stuck behind a mini van that was going about twenty. So I tailed Van Man, hoping that he would speed up. Oh yeah, toilet paper and gum. 

No luck. Van Man barely rolled along, repeatedly hitting the brakes, turning into a souped-up teeter totter.

I sulked in my seat, tortoise-crawling down the road. Jesus, I said to myself, watching the brake lights blink in front of me. I turned the radio on and off.

Still, the van was barely moving in front of me.

I knew that I was going to be really late.

Then, suddenly, the Van Man came to a full stop in the middle of the road.

Startled, I hit my brakes, assuming that Van Man was going to jump out of the car and yell at me for tailing him. Nervous, I waited for the attack. But I was dead wrong.

Van Man just sat there in the middle of the road.  

Frozen meals. Studying the scene a little closer, I saw a large, ghostly shape move in front of the van. I squinted; it was a huge, majestic deer -- a king-sized buck with an enormous set of antlers. He was beautiful, and he wasn't in a hurry either. Slowly, he made his way across the road, one graceful step at a time. When he almost reached the other side, he stopped, looking up. There, he stared at me, gazing through my windshield, seeming to look me right in the eye. He paused a little, fiercely staring. Then, ever so calmly, he went on his way into the woods.

This world is so much bigger than me.

And I realized that I was a trespasser in his home. If it weren't for the Van Man holding me back, I would've hit that beautiful deer. And what a magnificent creature he was. I believe in angels. That soul, that dignified buck. Dear god.

C.A. MacConnell